Saturday, February 19, 2011

on pins and needles...

I am feeling very anxious right now and I have been for most of this week. I feel like I'm sitting on pins and needles waiting to hear from our dear friends, who are really family. Their sweet baby boy Benjamin Michael was born on Wednesday morning. He has a congenital diaphragmatic hernia. Basically a hole in his diaphram. We've known about this for awhile and have been praying. We've known he has to get surgery right away and that he would not be breathing on his own. We also know the hole isn't as big as they originally thought. We even heard he took a small breath on his own. He is at Shands Hospital in Gainesville under the care of some top doctors. I just can't stop thinking about why this is happening. I believe in God and know that He never gives us more than we can handle. It just still seems unreal to me.

And then I got a call last night from my brother that Benjamin is not doing as well as he should be and they are holding off on the surgery for a few more days. This scares me. I can only imagine how Cindy and Anthony are feeling right now---so many emotions. I just hope they know how many of us are supporting and praying for them.Damian and I were both in tears as we were talking about it last night. I know how blessed I am...I had two "textbook" complications, delivered two healthy babies on my due dates.
I just couldn't hug and kiss my own "babies" enough last night. And I cannot wait until the day I can see Cindy and Anthony loving on baby Benjamin and holding him in their arms. (I also can't wait to give Benjamin BIG, loud gifts just like Aunt Cindy and Uncle Anthony have given to Emma and Max!!)

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